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Name Games: government by label maker.
Gulfs, mountains, bases, a lake, a department, an airport, an arts center, and now AI. Welcome to the presidency’s sticker collection. Each entry separates what changed from what was merely announced, proposed, or blocked.
Original satirical illustration of a presidential label-making workshop. The scene and dialogue are invented.
January 20, 2025 / Federal naming directive
Gulf of Mexico / Gulf of America
The order directs U.S. federal naming and references for the specified gulf area. It does not give the president ownership of the world's vocabulary.
Read the gulf naming orderOur take: The water did not attend the branding meeting.
Same coastline. Same storms. New lettering. Somewhere, a presidential aide is explaining to a hurricane that it now needs to destroy American property more patriotically.
January 20, 2025 / Federal mountain name
Denali / Mount McKinley
The order reinstates Mount McKinley in federal nomenclature. Denali National Park and Preserve keeps its name.
Read the mountain naming orderOur take: Apparently, even a mountain needs to sit through a presidential identity crisis.
The summit has declined to comment. It has been above this sort of thing for quite some time.
2025 / Administration-directed reversals
Nine Army bases. Another round of signs.
The administration restored nine earlier installation names, formally assigning new namesakes rather than the Confederate figures previously commemorated. Bragg and Benning were directed earlier in 2025; seven further reversals followed. This is a series of Army and Defense Department actions, not one geographic naming order.
Read the Army’s naming recordOur take: The sign is back. The explanation has been rewritten. The troops still have an actual job to do.
Nine installations, another round of signs, and a fresh set of explanations. The label maker has received its deployment orders. The troops still have the difficult jobs.
- Fort Liberty → Fort Bragg
- Fort Moore → Fort Benning
- Fort Cavazos → Fort Hood
- Fort Eisenhower → Fort Gordon
- Fort Gregg-Adams → Fort Lee
- Fort Johnson → Fort Polk
- Fort Novosel → Fort Rucker
- Fort Barfoot → Fort Pickett
- Fort Walker → Fort A.P. Hill
Bragg and Benning: February and March 2025 directives. The Army documented the additional reversals in its 2025 review. The restored names formally commemorate different people from the original Confederate namesakes.
Read the Bragg directive Read the Benning directive Read the Hood accountSeptember 5, 2025 / Secondary designation
Defense / War
The order authorizes Department of War as a secondary title. It preserves statutory Defense references unless changed by law.
Read the War title orderOur take: A dramatic new title is easier to announce than a policy worth defending.
‘War’ sounds splendid on an action-movie poster. Unfortunately, a cabinet department still needs a strategy after the opening credits.
December 2025 onward / Board action blocked in court
Kennedy Center / the Trump naming fight
The board tried to add Trump to the name of the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts. A federal court rejected that action. On September 15, 2026, the court also blocked a proposed Trump renovation inscription and President Donald J. Trump Plaza designation. This is a naming fight, not a completed legal renaming.
Read the Kennedy Center rulingOur take: A national treasure was apparently missing the one thing every Trump project needs: more Trump.
He looked at a national stage full of artists and spotted the real problem: somebody else’s name was getting top billing.
Symbolic editorial cartoon: presidential branding takes the stage while the artists leave. This is an invented scene.
The damage extends beyond the sign. Hamilton canceled its planned 2026 engagement. Washington National Opera ended its affiliation in January 2026, describing an incompatible business model and reduced support services. On October 2, AP reported that this year's Kennedy Center Honors would move to Capital One Arena amid the center's closure and naming fight.
Read the opera company's letter Read the Hamilton cancellation report Read the Honors relocation reportOur take: He treated an extraordinary cultural institution as an empty surface for his name. Artists, audiences, and the institution itself have paid for the ego trip. That is vandalism by management, with a branding department attached.
July 9, 2026 / Florida law
Palm Beach International / President Donald J. Trump International
The airport says its name changed under Chapter 2026-15, Laws of Florida. Palm Beach County retained ownership and operational control. This was state legislation honoring Trump, not a presidential executive order.
Read the airport announcementOur take: Your flight can be delayed. The self-congratulation is always on time.
Arrivals. Departures. Baggage claim. Presidential ego. Please allow extra time to pass through self-congratulation.
August 27, 2026 / Federal naming directive
Lake Ontario / Lake America
Executive Order 14422 directs Interior and the Board on Geographic Names to rename Lake Ontario in federal records and references. The order addresses U.S. federal usage; it does not make Canada adopt the name.
Read the lake naming orderOur take: One shared lake. One unshared ego.
The lake is shared with Canada. The naming enthusiasm appears to be unilateral. Border authorities have yet to persuade the water to pick a side.
September 29, 2026 / Executive-branch terminology
AI / SI
The order directs the executive branch to use SI in place of AI where law permits, using the existing AI definition.
Read the AI-to-SI orderOur take: The software got a new name. The rest of us got another thing we're supposed to applaud.
Same model, same wrong answer, better stationery. If an S fixed hallucinations, spellcheck would have won the Nobel Prize.
These entries describe what the cited orders direct or authorize. An announcement, a secondary designation, and a change enacted by law are different things. The distinction belongs in the story, even when the punch line is irresistible.
Read the AI Rebrand