The men signing the White House Accord on Super Intelligence came to reassure America about the future of technology. Then somebody handed them a pen, and the meeting became a parent-teacher conference.
Key Takeaways
- The real accord carries the signatures of Elon Musk, Dario Amodei, and Greg Brockman.
- The printed title beneath Trump's signature says "President of the Unites States."
- Our classroom, teacher, and parent-teacher conference are invented satire.
Three of the signers look like they skipped handwriting class to concentrate on their super intelligence. You can almost hear Mommy and Daddy explaining it to the teacher: "Our little genius isn't bad at handwriting. He's disrupting cursive."
Elon Musk: The pencil is attempting to escape.
Elon's signature has big strokes, little squiggles, and letters that seem to have separate travel plans. It looks like he started writing his name, spotted a rocket outside, and finished while running toward the window.
The teacher would like him to slow down. Mommy would like the teacher to understand that Elon is operating at a level beyond lined paper.
Dario Amodei: Completed on the bus.
Dario makes a more recognizable attempt. There's a name in there, although it has the cramped, hurried look of homework finished with a backpack balanced on two knees.
He gets partial credit for making contact with the assignment. His imaginary progress report reads: "Dario shows promise. Please remind him that the letters are allowed to have their own space."
Greg Brockman: The printed name did the group project.
Greg contributes a tiny initial-like mark to a generous stretch of signature line. The printed "Greg Brockman" underneath supplies nearly everything you need to know.
This is the kid who puts his name on the group project after everybody else has built the volcano.
"Greg, use the whole line. We paid for the whole line."
The rest of the class.
Trump contributes an enormous sawblade. Zuckerberg submits what appears to be a diagram of a charging cable found in a drawer. Jensen Huang's signature wanders across the printed labels like it has diplomatic immunity.
Then there's the actual printed title beneath Trump's signature: "President of the Unites States."
Seven signatures. One spelling mistake. Somewhere, a substitute teacher is wondering whether the extra twenty dollars was worth it.
The original signature page is available for inspection. The parent-teacher conference is our invention. The paperwork, unfortunately, is theirs.
Before the next signing ceremony, give everybody a pencil, a sheet of lined paper, and one simple instruction:
Write "United States" five times. Then you can have snack.
From The Department of Elementary Intelligence: Show your work. Use the whole line. Stop licking the gold star. Find more lessons in the series, or share the original cartoon with credit.
Frequently Asked Questions
Which three signers are featured in the classroom cartoon?
Elon Musk of xAI, Dario Amodei of Anthropic, and Greg Brockman of OpenAI. The real accord also includes Donald Trump, Sundar Pichai, Mark Zuckerberg, and Jensen Huang.
Did Trump personally type the spelling mistake?
The printed title beneath his signature contains "Unites States." The document does not identify who typed that caption.
Did the handwriting class or parent-teacher conference happen?
No. The classroom, teacher, worksheets, and dialogue are invented satire. The joke does not establish anything about the signers' intelligence or childhood schooling.
Where can I inspect the actual signatures?
The Signers page reproduces both pages and links to the PDF. The American Presidency Project also archives the accord, dated September 29, 2026.
Receipts
The American Presidency Project's archived accord supplies the names, affiliations, date, and printed typo. The complete signed PDF preserves the document. Our handwriting descriptions are comic opinions, and all classroom scenes and dialogue are invented.
The safety accord and executive-branch renaming order are separate documents. Our AI-to-SI rebrand page follows the naming paperwork.
